So, I’m kind of in an interesting predicament, because I’ve merged my “freedom from the man” blog with my public blog for The Canvas and now I’m at a crossroads of keeping up appearances for The Canvas and keepin’ it real!
People started reading this blog because they connected with the quest to find career fulfillment. I’ve had so many people sympathize about “soulless” jobs and lack of purpose. They hand me props for stepping out of that framework and paving my own path. And I’m proud of myself for taking this risk. But I have to admit, there are days when I think “this isn’t all it’s cracked up to be!”
It all started with an idea. That people needed to consume less and create more. That art could be more than something to look at — it could be something that people do together. It was a great idea. And now I look back and wonder, what made me actually act on it? C’mon, people have great ideas every day! Nobody every does anything with them! Turning ideas into reality — now that’s A LOT of work!
What did I get myself into!?
A job applicant came in the other day and told me that there were two types of people: people who work to live, and people who live to work. If you work to live, you make the best of your boring 9 to 5 and take solace in the lifestyle it affords you. If you live to work, you choose a work atmosphere that makes you feel good, even if it doesn’t bring home the same bacon that your buddy with the jet skis makes.
I thought it was pretty cool that he identified at such a young age that he wanted to live to work, and that he thought The Canvas would provide that for him. I think it was the same belief system that set me out on this quest. It’s an ideology that you can get wrapped up in. And at times it can make you blind to the simple fact that at the end of the day, work is still work.
I think that the bridge between “idea” and “reality” is definitely the hardest part. My “reality” for The Canvas looks like smiling people, sunny days, color and movement; it smells like paints, perfumes and roasting vegetables; it sounds like laughter, music and passion; and it feels like we’re on the brink of something new and novel, every day, like synergy and progress…
But the road to get there looks like too many file folders with the tab on the right side, stacks of paperwork and spinny wheel on the macintosh; it smells like I might have forgotten to shower, or I didn’t get enough sleep; it sounds like the City of Portland, contractors, vendors and landlords; and it feels like I could have an anxiety attack at any moment!
Seventeen days to go and I am definitely feeling the pressure. Will my licenses come through in time? Will my kitchen inspection go smoothly? Will noise continue to be an issue in the building? Has my inventory arrived in full? Do those colors really “work”? Who’s the best candidate? Should I or shouldn’t I employ a friend? Which food vendors offer the best quality, at the most competitive price? Just how much is my time worth? How will opening day go?
It’s super hard not to stress. And a lot’s on the line. But I’m chugging through and I’m going to make this happen. Even if it does feel like “work” most days. So here’s to keepin’ it real and sharing the good, the bad and the ugly. Now that I’ve made it over that hump, I’ll try to write more! Believe me, it’s therapeutic. And what business owner isn’t in need of a good dose of therapy?
